DONT TELL ME / written by Jody Walker for her son Shane 1998

This is what i have told so many people when they tell me that someone they know or love has passed, jodi put this on paper.... she absolutely wrote exactly how i feel............. 

DONT TELL ME 
Friday, July 8, 2011 at 1:13pm

Don't Tell Me
Please don't tell me you know how I feel,
Unless you have lost your child too,
Please don't tell me my broken heart will heal,
Because that is just not true,
Please don't tell me my son is in a better place,
Though it is true, I want him here with me,
Don't tell me someday I'll hear his voice, see his face,
Beyond today I cannot see,
Don?t tell me it is time to move on,
Because I cannot,
Don?t tell me to face the fact he is gone,
Because denial is something I can't stop,
Don't tell me to be thankful for the time I had,
Because I wanted more,
Don't tell me when I am my old self you will be glad,
I'll never be as I was before,
What you can tell me is you will be here for me,
That you will listen when I talk of my child,
You can share with me my precious memories,
You can even cry with me for a while,
And please don't hesitate to say his name,
Because it is something I long to hear everyday,
Friend please realize that I can never be the same,
But if you stand by me, you may like the new person I become someday.

Judi Walker
(In Memory of Shane)
Copyright 1998

Candys Thoughts: July 14 th 2011

Candys Thoughts: July 14 th 2011: "The time is 0201, i am tired but cannot sleep. It has been one yr, 4 months and 6 days since my son has passed away. I have met others w..."

July 14 th 2011

The time is 0201,  i am tired but cannot sleep.  It has been one yr, 4 months and  6 days since my son has passed away.  I have met others who have lost a son, a husband, another child,  i have learned so much and i will continue to learn.  The pain is still real,  my heart, my soul ,  my mind aches , some days i cry so hard my head hurts.  One thing i have learned .............   in councelling they said if you have to cry .......cry it doesnt matter where you are, who you are with....   and i do.   
    I know that God has his hand on everything.  If it were not for the grace of God i would not be able to make it.  I know I am blessed with the support system i have, God,  Friends, Family, Eric is my rock.  He has been through so much with me.  
   I know everything I go through,  I am going to meet someone who is going thruough the same thing. 
I always tell them,  I am not special, I am not strong,  I could not have made it with out God.  If I can do this so can you.  i have come across some poems i will be posting on here.  Truly i wish i had been the person to write them.   I have not written a poem since Shane passed away March 8th 2010.  
   Praying you have a blessed day and you realize,  
I can do all things through Christ which strengthenth me............ 
Though I am weak,  through Christ I am made strong.  it is only through him i have survived......
have a blessed day  

Life is too short to be grumpy

Today is july 13th 2010,

Tuesday 1203 hrs

From the time I was a child, I have had dreams that come true, and I have also

found out that everything I have been through in my life, God has sent someone my

way who is going through the same thing and I have been able to hold out my hand

and lead them across the long swaying bridge, to safety.

It is amazing that God chooses people to meet and become not only good

friends but extended family members. I have met so many people and i am also a

person who doesnt know a stranger. When my son or boyfriend sees me talking to

someone, They will ask me WHO IS THAT? then shake their heads and say ......

I KNOW .......... YOU DONT EVEN KNOW THEM.........

this is what makes life so interesting. my motto is LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BE GRUMPY

and the truth is............ it is!!!!!!! I cannot imagine going through life being miserable.

i have always been a happy person, full of life and i love life. I have never had a desire to

do anything but do my best to live a good life, be there for those I love and being as honest

as i can be. I am not perfect, but since i was a child of thirteen yrs old i begin to watch people

and without judging, watched the lives of those i met and knew. I knew who i wanted to be like

and also knew who i didnt want to be like. It was fine for them but did not appeal to me.

I have always tried to be patient, caring, and through the years I have the urge that

drives me to always being a caretaker to those around me.

I am very tired and will have to finish sometime when i wake later in the morning

Have a blessed day and I thank God for his hand upon my life